Safety (tags Katy)

[Jefferson Davis McIntosh]

Jeff did not feel particularly charitable toward those who stayed in the closet. "His parents wouldn't care!" He scoffed; Zach's parents were noticeable only in their general absence from their son's life and he couldn't imagine that Zach's preferences would ever galvanize them to any sort of action. "So who would give a fuck? The soccer team? Aren't they all friends with Mike Spruill or something? Mike's only problem is all the drugs and crap he does, nobody ever said anything when he dated that Irish dude. Sure, Quentin Ferris would care but Quentin hates everyone. Zach is just a wuss."

"You're so lucky, at least you don't gotta put up with this stupid closeted shit." He grumbled, resting his chin on his knees. "If a guy wants to date you he won't try and make stupid ass excuses about it, he'll just ask." This was a gross romanticism, of course, but he wanted to believe that if Zach had only admitted he was gay then things would have worked out, which meant simplifying problems that might exist with other people's relationships.

Kate seemed to drift off, probably sympathizing with Zach. What was up with that, anyway? She seemed to really want him to forgive his former friend. Maybe she had a crush on him. "Uhhh, you okay?" He asked, waving his hand in front of her face. "Earth to Ka---Grace. Dammit. I'll never get that right. Have I mentioned lately you should stick with Kate?"

He brushed crumbs off his jeans as he stood, stretching. "Okay, enough about Zach. You can feel sorry for him all you want, I still think he's a little shit. If you want to be all chummy with him I won't stop you, just don't expect me to be best pals with him again. So music? Or football?" He asked as he strode over to his closet, ready to pull out laptop or ball depending on what Kate preferred -- and stopping short after sliding open the door, noticing that things were not as he'd left them; his glorious mess had been disturbed, and he knew it hadn't been himself.

"Hey! Somebody straightened my shoes!" He said with suspicion. "Argh! Winnie! Going through my crap again! You'd think she owned the whole fuckin' house!"

[Katelyn Grace Walker]

Zach home life was a mystery to Kate, not that she really cared. She barely knew the boy as someone other than the guy Jeff used to hang around. Now she understood why, but that didn't change much other than perhaps evoking a bit of sympathy for a kid struggling to come to terms with his identity. Kate could relate.

“I don't know his parents, I'm just saying that's a possibility,” she countered, agitation growing in her voice. “There could be other family members that wouldn't approve, or maybe he's like religious or something. Or maybe he was picked on as a kid, who knows?” Most kids understood what it was like to be picked on, and thought Kate assumed it was worse for homosexuals she had never fallen victim to such taunts. She only dated a boy once in the sixth grade for a week, but that seemed to have solidified her hetero status. “And just because some people are lucky and escape ridicule cause they're popular or well liked, or threatening or something, doesn't mean people don't talk about them behind their backs!” She was kneeling now, in much too tense a state to be sprawled on the floor. Too many times she had heard people say really mean things about friends like Jeff or nice guys like Jeremy Warner just because they were gay.

She shut up quickly when Jeff mentioned how lucky she was. She hated when guys creeped on her, when they thought it was okay to put their arms around her and talk to her when she didn't even know them. She had even purchased a can of pepper spray recently specifically because she had met Xavier Goodwin. It wasn't until recently she figured out that it was simply because they were guys.

She shuddered with the thought until Jeff snapped her out of it. “I know, you tell me like every time you mess it up.” She liked Kate, it was fine, but it seemed so tomboyish to her. And when a lot of the other girls found out her middle name was Grace, and told her that was a much prettier name, well, it was hard to say no. “I just... I like Grace, and...” she knew she couldn't explain all the reasons to Jeff. “I just like it.”

She didn't want to talk about Zach, really. But there was something about that conversation she did want to talk about. Would Jeff understand? Likely not. He'd probably try to bully her into telling everyone. “I don't want to talk about Zach, or 'be all chummy' with him,” she said softly. She barely even gave any effort to mocking Jeff's phrase. But she did get up and follow Jeff to his closet, tugging her sweatpants up as she walked. She stayed quiet, watching as he discovered the newly clean state of his space, but her mind was racing. Her heart pounded in her chest, and she half expected Jeff at any moment to ask her who the heck was playing the drums.

“Jeff,” she started, her voice soft and filled with anxiety. “I don't... I... I understand Zach. Wanting to hide it, and all. I mean I understand. You know?” Her question was vague, but she couldn't bring herself to say it out loud. She just hoped Jeff would figure it out.

[Jefferson Davis McIntosh]

Jeff frowned down at his now organized belongings, wondering what reason Varina could possibly have for straightening up his closet. Probably couldn't stand the fact that he just threw his shoes in there haphazardly.

"What?" He asked distractedly, shoving his door closed without actually fetching anything. "You....what?" He asked again, this time doubtfully. He wasn't sure exactly where she was going with this. So she thought it was understandable and acceptable for Zach to lie to everyone. She'd already explained this to him in great, vehement, and annoyingly logical length. He didn't want to admit that there were legitimate reasons to keep silent; people got bullied for all sorts of reasons, for things that they couldn't hide even, and he stubbornly refused to give Zach any leniency on this subject.

"Uhh, so you got a secret relationship goin', huh?" He guessed. Who did she hang around with frequently? Or maybe it was someone she claimed to absolutely loathe, someone she wouldn't want anyone to know she was seeing. He didn't know what the big deal was with hiding relationships, though; was there anyone worth hiding? Well, maybe if she was dating Quentin she'd want to hide it. Or Jasper Hastings -- good looking, but an unbearable snob. She hadn't even admitted to finding anyone attractive, though; hell, she usually chased off guys who so much as looked at her, so he didn't see how anyone would get close enough for a secret relationship.

As he stood there, hand on the closet door, staring at her with wrinkled brow, suspicions finally trickled into his brain. "Wait...you....ummmm.....really?"

All the times she'd rolled her eyes when his fellow males flirted with her, and he'd not once suspected. He'd never noticed her checking out any girls or anything, either! But then, if she said she wanted to keep things secret, or understood why someone would, then she was probably trying pretty hard. Just like Zach. He almost asked whose heart she was ripping out and stomping on, but decided that would be unfair; he didn't mind tearing down Zach, but Kate was still his friend and she hadn't hurt him. Maybe she wasn't seeing anyone, anyway, and she really just meant she understood, not that she was in the same situation.

"Oh, c'mon, Ka---Grace! What about that senior couple? The musician chick and her girlfriend? They don't get picked on! Although, I guess they kind of skip school all the time." He realized. "You really don't wanna tell anyone?"

[Katelyn Grace Walker]

Kate nodded at Jeff's final guess. So now he knew. Someone knew her secret. Her face began turning red and she immediately started to feel regret. She shouldn't have told him, what was she thinking! Now everyone would know. The girls on the basketball team would treat her like a leper! She started to back up slowly, away from her friend.

Did Jeff really think that no one cared about the two seniors that were together? “Jeff, people talk about them all the time! The soccer team has a bet running that one of them actually has a,” she made a crude gesture to indicate male genitalia. “What if people start saying stuff like that about me? Wouldn't you be mad? I know when people say stuff about you it pisses me off!” It was hard to not care what people thought of you. Kate wanted her teammates to like her, she didn't want them to feel awkward when they showered or had sleepovers or anything. She still wanted her friends.

Jeff just really didn't get it. Kate spun around and grabbed her Sooners hoodie off Jeff's bed. “You don't get it. You just don't.” Kate's tone was serious, her eyes filled with a mix of anger and sadness. Was this what it was like when Zach and Jeff had argued about this same thing? If Kate ever dated, would she have to have the same talk with some girl? She wondered if it would be better if she were just asexual. She pulled on the hoodie and looked towards the door.

“Maybe I should just go.”

[Jefferson Davis McIntosh]

“Course it would make me mad! If anyone says anything about you, I’ll punch them,” Jeff offered helpfully, as if this would solve any and all problems. He figured that not that many people would say anything, anyway. After all, Kate was one of the coolest people in the school, he didn’t see why anyone would say anything bad about her.

Of course, he also tended not to really notice when people spread filth about other people; he was more concerned with what Varina was up to than the school gossip. And he was so absorbed in his own world that he only realized people were mocking his preferences when they confronted him face to face; otherwise he was blissfully unaware that anyone had anything awful to say about him – a fact that, along with his encouraging family, probably had a great deal to do with his insistence that coming out was Not That Bad.

“Go? What?! Why?” He really didn’t think he’d said anything all that bad. He didn’t think she ought to stay quiet about liking girls, but he failed to comprehend how that could upset her so much. “I’m not saying like, go tag the school with K---Grace loves chicks or nothing. Just, you know, not hide it?” He suggested uncertainly. “I mean, yeah, some people’ll stop wantin’ to hang out, but they’re dicks anyway so screw them.”

That admission was probably not going to persuade her to change her mind, though, so he changed courses quickly. “Don’t go, don’t go! You’d rather spend the weekend with Parson than with me? That really hurts. I don’t think you’re shitty like Zach, you wouldn’t tell the girl you were seeing you didn’t really like her, she was all an experiment to see whether you really liked chicks or not.”

He didn’t really know if she would say such a thing or not, but he didn’t really want his best friend upset with him. He was starting to wonder if he was going to eventually lose all his friends over this, which would be stupid considering that most of his friends were, apparently, gay.

[Katelyn Grace Walker]

Kate tucked her hands in to the pocket of her hoodie, uncertain whether she should leave or not. “It's not like I'm lying to people about it, dating all sorts of guys and stuff. No one's really asked me or anything,” she stated, shrugging her shoulders. “But I don't wanna but my hair short and wear flannels just so people know I like girls.” Without realizing it, Kate had just said what she had been entirely afraid to. It was scary, but it also felt good.

That some people would stop hanging out with her was one of the things that scared Kate the most, however. “I don't want to lose any friends, though! Doesn't really suck that you don't hang out with Zach anymore?” She knew the answer, and though it was a different situation, losing a friend was losing a friend. She plopped down onto Jeff's bed, exasperated with herself and the world. Why couldn't it be easy? Why couldn't people like who they wanted without some stupid judgement being cast on them?

“Jeff, I don't know what to do and this really sucks and no offense but you're not really that helpful.” Kate managed the whole sentence in one breath. She wasn't blaming him, and she wasn't mad at him anymore, but she wished he had some sort of magic answer to solve everything. And “tell everyone” wasn't it.

Kate sighed. Maybe she should just forget about ever dating. “Sorry,” she mumbled, not knowing how else to apologize. “And no, I don't want to hang out with Parson over you.” The thought of her brother brought a funny yet disturbing thought to her mind. Parson was so idiosyncratic that there was no way he'd ever find a girlfriend. And with Kate's lifestyle, there was one obvious conclusion. “My mother's never going to have grandkids...” Kate couldn't help but giggle at the fact, though it was just another reason never to tell her mother she was gay. “I mean, it's not like Parson's ever going to have sex!”

[Jefferson Davis McIntosh]

Jeff struggled to answer when Kate asked if he missed Zach. He wanted to just say no, but that wasn't entirely truthful. He did miss Zach, but as nothing had changed in any way he found acceptable there wasn't much use moping -- not that he let that stop him. She didn't seem to really expect a verbal response, though, as she continued voicing her fears, which apparently culminated in not giving her mother grandchildren. "Uhhh, a little early to be thinkin' kids, innit?" He asked, sliding his closet door open once more and pulling out his laptop. If they were going to hang around and discuss Kate's revelation (a much more pressing one than his own, he decided, mostly because it took the focus off him) then they needed some background music. "You could adopt. Although I dunno who wouldn't wanna jump Parson, he is kinda hot...kidding, kidding!!" He added hastily, hiding behind his laptop in case she decided to try and smack him for such unnecessary provocation.

"Silversun Pickups or Jimmy Eat World?" He mused before flopping down onto the bed and snapping his computer open. "Eh, why not both." He decided, motioning to Kate to join him.

"Ugh, sorry, I dunno what to tell you." He admitted after a moment spent setting up his computer and pulling up winamp. "I mean, I know it's not easy, but it's not as bad as you're making out. Sure, you gotta come out pretty much every time you meet someone new, but I dunno, you always have to learn shit about people when you meet 'em. And some people'll be dicks about it, but there are always shitty people." He felt that this was perfectly logical, but apparently he wasn't convincing his friend. "I was worried about telling people, but most people've been pretty cool." He told her, hoping that would cheer her up some. Sure, some members of the football team made it known they weren't that comfortable with his presence, but coach Johnson was scary enough that nobody dared bother him (or Mike) anywhere the coach might see. In fact, people rarely said anything to his face. Apparently they did were Kate could hear, but he told himself she was just exaggerating the prevalence of such comments.

"I guess...thanks for telling me," He told her finally, pushing his computer to one side so he could lean across his bed, reaching down to grab the remaining oreos. Even if she wasn't going to run out and tell the world, at least she'd trusted him enough to say something, although he wasn't too sure he was flattered that she'd considered fleeing immediately after. "It sucks more not to tell, after you let people you care about know it's like, okay, I did that already, it's over, don't gotta do it again. And everyone else can just fuck off." He assured her, as though his relatively easy coming out was a universal experience.

He idly spun the oreo between his fingers. "So girls, huh? You don't make a good fag hag, you know that, right? Aren't you supposed to suggest we pick up guys together or something?" Varina would be so disappointed in him if she ever found out -- not like that was anything new. "I think I have to fire you for real this time...." He said seriously, then laughed, "Naw, you're still the same Kate. If I wanted a real fag hag I'd hang out with Winnie's friends." He shuddered at the thought of spending his time with squealing teeny boppers, "You're way cooler than any of them."

[losangelespolice]

There was a muffled vaguely musical sound coming from behind the closed bedroom door, the two uniformed officers exchanged a glance the father to the boy in question gave a tentative knock before opening the door and clearing his throat.

"How many ways do you want to die..." the lead singer warbled through the speakers causing another exchange of looks between the two.

"Jeff," Mr. McIntosh looked a little pale, "These two officers need to speak to you." He pointed to the laptop, "That needs to be off. Now." Worry and tension made his voice harsher than normal.

The lead of the two officers stepped forward a bit placing a hand on the elder McIntosh's shoulder. Her dark hair was pulled back into a tight braid beneath her uniform hat, which was subsequently removed. "Jefferson, we need to talk to you about an altercation you had this afternoon with a Zachary Doyle." It was a firm, no nonsense tone and her brown eyes studied the teenage boy's face as she spoke.

"How many times do you wanna die?
How many ways do you wanna die?

Do you feel safe again? Look over your shoulder
Very carefully look over your shoulder

You used to do a little but a little won't fly right before -- " Jeff clicked winamp closed and slid off the bed, giving Kate a worried look. Had Zach seriously called the police on him for...for what? Speaking angrily? If he wanted to call the police on someone, wouldn't it have made more sense to pick Quentin? Or was this some sort of sick revenge for not accepting his apologies?

"Ummm. Okaaaaay." He muttered uncertainly, looking between the officers and his father. His father looked more worried than he should have for such a silly little argument, but then Jeff was pretty sure there was no real reason that the police should be interested in their argument at all. "I can't believe that asshole called the police over a stupid fight."

Up went the officer's eyebrows at the boy's impertinent response. Out came a little spiral bound notebook and a pent. Click went the pen's tip into a position where it was most suitable for use. "Can you not? By our accounts it was a fairly serious argument." Perhaps more considering where and how the boy had ended up. Tread softly, the officer reminded herself, he's just a kid, but he could still be dangerous. To her mind, any of the kids attending Silver or Gould were dangerous. Why ELSE would both locations be having such problems. MORE now that the schools were merged for the remainder of the school year with talks of permanence.

"How would you say the argument ended?" With a knife to the gut?

Jeff thought back to his fight with Zach, trying to recall exactly how things had gone down. He'd been so busy telling Kate a slightly altered version, one wherein Zach was the biggest offender, that actual facts were now somewhat difficult to recall. "I told him to fuck off. Then I left." He told her. That wasn't exactly what he'd said, but telling the officer the entire fight would involve outing Zach to even more people than just Kate (and Varina, who had always known) and as much as he hated that Zach was closeted he wasn't going to force him out.

Pen scratched across the surface of the paper leaving what could be aptly described as chicken scratch attempting to masquerade as Greek. "Mhm. And you left then? Where did you go next?"

Mr. McIntosh shifted uncomfortably, redistributing his weight from right to left.

"Ummm, I finished buying texas pete and oreos and came home. Dude, why the fuck does it matter where I went? I had a fight with Zach, so fucking what? Is there some sort of stupid rule about getting the police involved in fights in the grocery store or something I didn't know about?" He asked, shoulders hunching up with tension as the questions continued. He knew he should have been more polite, but the vague questions and lack of any real context was, frankly, scaring the shit out of him. The very apparent worry on his father's face wasn't helping, either. What was this all about, anyway? Why would Zach call the police about this? Or maybe the manager of the grocery store had, and they were both in trouble, but while that thought was more comforting he felt that probably a store manager would have approached them and called the police at that moment, not wait until later.

He looked over to the older McIntosh, wishing he would say something encouraging rather than avoiding his gaze. He wanted to ask his dad for help, but he couldn't bring himself to do so.

"Language, Jeff," McIntosh admonished, to the officers he added, "My son's been home with his friend here. I've already said as much."

"And we appreciate your cooperation, Mr. McIntosh, but procedures must be followed." The woman's eyes shifted to the girl, Kate, and her lips pressed into a thoughtful line. Though she fancied herself a profiler, she had yet to get into the FBI's BAU which was a point of aggravation. Still, she couldn't see the guilt on his face or in his actions.

"Zachary was attacked not long after your encounter. We have reasons to believe you may be involved." Let's see how he takes that bit of information.

Jeff stared at the officer in shock. "A...attacked?" He sputtered. "Aw, fuck." He caught his father's gaze and winced guiltily at already failing to watch his language. "Sorry." He muttered, then, "Attacked. He was attacked. And why the fuck would I be involved in attacking Zach?" Stupid, probably tried to interfere with Quentin again or something. "I mean, okay, we had a fight, sure, am I supposed to go around attacking everyone I don't like?"

He shot Kate a look, hoping she wouldn't say anything, and that she didn't believe he'd attacked Zach before calling her. She'd thought he sounded weird, maybe she'd believe the police. But she knew him better than that. Didn't she?

The boy's reaction wasn't quite what the officer had anticipated. It was guilty, defensive, shocked, and very, very teenage boy filled with angst. It told her nothing. Jefferson wasn't a full-fledged suspect yet, merely a person of interest. That being said, their list of "persons of interest" was short. Until Zachary was able to speak to them himself no one could be discounted. Particularly not someone who'd had a witnessed altercation that had risen in volume and violent gestures.

With the nature of the stabbings in mind, it was a very personal assault. Someone who knew Zachary. The deffensive wounds on his arms had indicated he'd tried to stave off the attacks, but his assailant had been either larger, stronger, or both.

"What was the fight about?" the pen was poised to take more notes. Any and all information was important and could shed any sort of light on the case.

Jeff felt his face begin to flush. This was not a question he was prepared to answer, particularly not in front of his father. The man had been quietly accepting, but there was something about admitting to a mostly physical relationship in the presence of parents that remained entirely uncomfortable. And anyway, he couldn't out Zach. He'd had a difficult enough time telling Kate, now he was supposed to tell some authority figures?

He looked to Kate for help, but none was forthcoming. "I....I.....it...Ican'ttellyou." He mumbled unhappily, wishing this hadn't happened. He should never have spoken to his stupid ex in the first place!

Inquisitive eyes narrowed thoughtfully as the pen scratched across the paper again. "You're not helping yourself, Jefferson." Though not quite gently goading, the voice did poke.

ETA:
The song Jeff and Kate are listening to is here

[Katelyn Grace Walker]

Jeff's joke made Kate smile, and she relaxed a little bit. “Hey, if you wanna jump my brother then go for it. Make him your problem, not mine!” She was incredibly glad to have a friend like Jeff, and she was glad she told him her secret. At his indication, she crawled up the bed and rested next to him, her head on his shoulder. She stared at his selection of music as she listened to him. In the end, he was probably right. She'd have to come out eventually, and some people wouldn't like it and she might lose friends, but they'd probably be sucky friends anyway. But that didn't mean it wouldn't hurt.

“Your welcome,” she mumbled into his shoulder, wrapping an arm around him and giving him a hug. “Sorry for getting mad.” She pulled back, freeing the boy up to grab the bowl of oreos. She started to reach for one, then caught herself. She had too many, she decided, and instead picked up the laptop and began looking through Jeff's music, mostly just to look and distract herself from her thoughts.

“Is that what Winnie thought I was, your fag hag?” She gave a loud laugh at the thought. “I guess I never thought of myself that way. And you're not really the kinda gay boy that hangs around all the bitchy girls.” She laughed at the thought of Jeff hanging around with Varina's friends. He'd probably blow his brains out after five minutes, before they could even get the skinny jeans on him! “Thanks, you're way cooler too. It's crazy to think you and your sister are actually related! You sure you're not-”

A knock on the door interrupted Kate's thought, and she turned to look at the door. She did not expect to see two police officers walk in with Jeff's dad. Her first thought was that they overheard the conversation and came to arrest her, but that was just plain insane. Her second thought was that something bad had happened to Varina and their mom. As much as she disliked Varina, Kate really hoped she was okay.

She sat and listened to the cops question Jeff, putting a hand on him when she first heard him swear. It would not help anything to be disrespectful to cops, that was for sure. But that was Jeff. Kate was much more a goodie two shoes than her best friend. She caught Jeff's look, but it was entirely unnecessary. She wasn't going to say a single word to the cops if she could help it. She was too scared of actual authority to say anything.

Jeff wouldn't have done anything to Zach... would he? She could easy see him getting into a fight, but with Zach? She dropped the thought from her head. No. Jeff would not have done that. He didn't even want to out Zach, so it was obvious he still cared at least a little bit for the boy. His plaintive eyes came back to Kate once again, and she felt guilty for not being able to help. What could she tell the cops that would help? A lie would only make things worse. Kate moved a hand onto Jeff's for support. She hoped Jeff would just tell the truth.

[Jefferson Davis McIntosh]

Jeff squirmed, trying to make himself smaller. He was grateful that Kate, at least, was being supportive. His father could've at least looked at him.

"You could just ask Zach." He suggested, "He was there, too, you know." It was only after the words left his mouth that he realized that Zach could easily have told them that Jeff hadn't attacked him if the cops had talked to him, and didn't they usually ask the victims first? He wasn't entirely sure, but that seemed like it would be logical. "You...you did talk to him first, right?" He asked anxiously. Zach wouldn't have lied and said he attacked him, would he have? Jeff had been so sure that Zach had just called over the fight at the store, but this being attacked business was something else entirely. He couldn't believe his former friend would frame him for something like that.

"You...you could ask Zach?" He repeated, less certainly this time, looking tentatively between the two officers. The grim stares did nothing to reassure him that they actually could, though. "He's not...he's not....fucker! When I told him to rot in hell I didn't mean do it literally." He mumbled furiously, now beginning to regret that he'd behaved so cruelly toward the other boy. It was too late to apologize now, though; he wouldn't even be allowed to apologize to the corpse at the funeral, he was sure, not when he was suspected of causing the death. That sent chills through his spine; he wasn't a murderer!

He couldn't take Zach back, he knew he would have spent the entire time waiting for everything to fall apart again, but he could have accepted the apology and moved on. He could have. But he hadn't. And now he had a pair of cops glaring at him and his dad apparently worried that his eldest son might actually be capable of doing enough physical damage to a former friend that the police had to get involved.

And he still didn't know exactly what had happened, just that Zach had been 'attacked'. And, apparently, was incapable of talking to the police. So of course his mind immediately leaped to 'murdered'. Nobody had said as much, but Zach would've been able to clear all this up if he had lived! Jeff had never wanted anything tragic to happen to the blond; he'd hinted darkly at wanting to beat him up, though, and if the police ever heard that they would surely read more into it than the stupid cross between jilted lover and tough guy he'd meant it as. He hadn't wanted Zach to die, though, just not ever talk to him again.

"It....it was just stupid." He stared down at his hands as he said this, wishing everyone would stop looking at him. He hated attention, and this scrutiny was promising to go on much longer than he was comfortable with. And what if it got out on the news he'd done something to Zach? He'd never be free of the public eye no matter what he did!

"We used to be....to be friends. We hadn't talked for a long time. Should've fucking kept not talking. He wanted to apologize but it just...it wasn't....he admitted he was a douche but he didn't actually wanna change anything, just thought I'd be all happy he finally realized he was a dick and go yeah, sure, let's be friends or some shit, but I told him to fuck that and left." He hoped that was enough to satisfy the woman staring at him; it hadn't satisfied Kate, though, so he had little hope he would be able to get away with not spilling everything.