Reckless Guilt: Eden tag Any

[Eden Patridge]

Staring out into nothingness, Eden spooned some yogurt into her mouth. Okay, it wasn't really nothing...it was the football field but Eden had been staring so long that it sort of had turned all into a blur. She had a joint in her pocket and she was deciding whether to smoke it or not...

She was at school, she knew that she wasn't supposed to smoke. Ben had been extra careful about it all since Jett's accident, not wanting to be caught not being sober.... Eden said she'd been more careful about it all, but it was all lies. In reality she was out of control.

Okay, maybe she had Jett had fought all of the time. Maybe they had broken up and gotten back together every other day. But so what? Eden had loved him and every time she'd broken up with him, a piece of her knew that the words were just out of anger. She did love him. But since the accident everything had been different. Eden had convinced herself that his accident was her fault and the guilt had been eating her over the past months.

She hadn't really been to visit Jett much. She'd been there the first night in the hospital and a few times after that when Ben had dragged her, but for the most part, Eden stayed away. She had made excuses not to go see him over and over again, lying and saying she'd go later when everyone around her was beginning to realize she never would.

And worse, she was pushing Izzy away too. It was sort of hard to hang out with your best friend when you were the reason her brother couldn't walk...

In reality, it wasn't Eden's fault. She just hadn't spent enough time with Jett to hear the truth. Eden and Jett had been fighting that night. She'd yelled at him when she'd learned he was at a party...giving him the 3rd degree about the college girls there...all basketball groupies... She'd threatened that if he didn't leave and come home that she'd break up with him for good. And really, Jett had ignored this. He'd known Eden was just being over dramatic and he'd been going to pick up more alcohol for his friends. But Eden thought he'd been driving home....driving to her when they accident had happened. She thought that he'd gotten in that car to see her and now he couldn't walk. It was just too much to handle...

So she'd become distant and reckless. She'd hang out with the boys and the beach when Ben wasn't around. She'd hook up with them...mostly making out but she'd slept with a few. She' even thought about calling up Sloane Taylor again, see what came of that, but the embarrassment of the first incident when Sloane had kissed her and Eden had freaked out, kept her from doing that.

She secluded herself at school...going off campus alone or doing things like coming to the empty football field during lunch and sitting on the bleachers alone. Jett used to play football here and now that doctors couldn't even say whether he'd really be able to walk again or not. And it was Eden's fault.... Her fault....

Fuck it. Eden pulled out the joint and lit it, pushing her yogurt aside, unaware that anyone else was around.

Tag Any

[Nate Kane]

Nate had a great guys night. He had ended up with some girl named Chrissy. Hell he was shocked he remembered that much. They had made out and she invited him to her car. Needless to say nothing else had to be mentioned. So Nate had shown up to school a little late for his first class. In fact when he got there the bell rang about five minutes later.

The day went by rather fast before lunch. Hopefully after lunch would go just as fast. Nate had enjoyed meeting Patrick. The guy was great. Nate was back in his groove. His non serious, fun loving groove. He was happy. Happier now then he had been in a while.

He decided to avoid the cafeteria cause you never know who you might run into there. He had yet to see his little nurse to see how she was doing, but he would hopefully run into her later. Now that he didn't have a girlfriend Nate felt he was more free to talk to ther girls then before.

Nate headed to the football field. Of course he went for a reason. No one just went to the field in his mind. He was meeting someone there. However, when he got there the blond on the bleachers was not who he was meeting. In fact she was the wrong sex, but that didn't stop Nate from walking over and getting a better look. He smiled as he saw the joint, "You sure you should be doing that out here?"

[Eden Patridge]

Eden wasn't really paying any attention as the guy approached her. In fact she didn't notice he was there at all until she heard him speak. Startled, she jumped slightly before relaxing her body once again. She didn't really know him but she'd seen him around. He was cute...had dated some girl last year if she remembered correctly. And now perhaps he was some sort of narc?

Eden wasn't really looking for trouble, she was just moody. She was always moody anymore. "It's probably a fucking terrible idea," she said. "But who cares?" she said with a shrug. And no one would care. Not her parents...maybe her mom had been home a little more than usual but just because she was staying in LA didn't mean she spent many nights at the house or even really showed an ounce more of interest in Eden or Ben's life. She didn't really have any friends anymore either...she'd pushed them all away. Sure, they tried still to reach out to her, but Eden hadn't exactly made it easy. She knew Ben would probably care...he always cared. In fact it felt like he was the only one who hadn't given up on her, but he would always care. And sure deep down that did comfort Eden a little bit, but at the moment she didn't really want to think about who she'd disappoint if she got caught smoking up on school grounds. Plus, Ben's only disappointment would be that she hadn't invited him to join her.

Eden looked at the boy almost defiantly, as if she was willing him to do something about it, as she took her first hit. Inhaling the smoke, she slowly let it release from her mouth before repeating these steps and taking a second hit like some sort of bad ass even though really she was anything but. She was just playing the part.

[Nate Kane]

Nate laughed. This girl was a tough cookie. He liked that. Nate watched her. "I got to give you credit. I just met you and I already like you. Not everyone is willing to just sit out here and smoke." He commented. "You got guts girl. I'm Nate." He said as he continued to sit back. She was cute. Blond and not brunette. Although Nate didn't discriminate he was trying t stay away from the brunettes.

"So can I ask exactly why you are out here smoking and defying school rules? I me wouldn't it be better just to ditch th rest of the day?" Although Nate could not really afford to skip the first week. Hell he shouldn't be skipping at all. He should be at school, but those were only minor details that one could over look for the right company.

Nate had smoked before bu he actually didn't mind watching this chick smoke. He wondered what she would be like high. Perhaps he could work his charm on her. Maybe get a date from her and a little more after the date. She was looking reall good. Man it felt good to think about banging some rando chick and not feeling guilty about it.

Guilt was the worst. Nate had felt so guilty when he had been with Skye. he felt bad looking at another girl. Hell he felt bad living with Trixie just down the hall. Now it was different. No guilt and it was very freeing.

[Eden Patridge]

Eden held back from rolling her eyes. He just met her and he already liked her? Was that supposed to be a compliment? Was she supposed to swoon? A million other sarcastic thoughts leaped into her head but she shook them off. What was with her? This wasn't her. Last year at this time she'd been a shy little girl who probably would have just blushed and been too scared to actually talk to this guy... Now, well, now things were different. How was it possible that so many things had changed? Jett. That was the exact answer, but Eden didn't really want to think about him. It just made her feel guilty and the guilt made her push everyone away and act like a mega-bitch. Be nice, she thought, it can't be that hard...

"I'm sure the teachers would love it if I ditched class my first week. I guess I don't really care though. I haven't decided what I'll do," she said. She knew that Ben was trying to be good...or at least better. Part of her wondering if it was his way of trying to point out that she was spiraling out of control. But the funny thing was that Eden was very aware of this. She knew exactly what she was doing. The problem was that she didn't really care.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, glancing out at the field. "Trying to make the team? Get some extra practices in during lunch?" she guessed. He looked like he could be the football type...the type she wanted to stay away from. Eden wanted to avoid jocks, although she wasn't quite sure that she could.

She took another hit of her joint before holding it out for him. "Want a hit?" she asked, raising her eyebrows wondering if he'd go for it. She still hadn't pinned him down and figured him out and wasn't sure if he'd accept or not.

[Nate Kane]

Nate smirked. "I don't need to practice. I am not a big jock." Sure he played football cause it could lead to scholarships and all, but he wasn't big on being a jock. He was good at it, but Nate prefered other activities to playing with a football. It was just a sport. Nothing more really. "What about you..out here to join the cheerleading squad. All sports needs its cheerleaders." he joked back. Of course Nate wasn't sure if she had even been joking, but he was.

"Sure. Looks like if we get caught we both get in trouble." He commented before taking a hit. "As for skipping school. I may not skip the first week, but i tend to enjoy three day weekends a lot." he always skipped on a friday. If you are going to skip, don't do it during the week, that was just stupid. He took one more hit ebfore handing it back to her. "Besides smoking what else do you enjoy?" he wondered.

Nate was actually enjoying her company. He liked girls with attitudes because it meant more or a challenge and challenges were fun. However, he was still unsure what kind of pursuit he would give. Nate, like Jay could be over confident. So far Nate decided on friend, but the girl was cute and he liked blonds, so he may try for more.

[Eden Patridge]

Eden wasn't sure if that meant he was on the team or not but she didn't ask. Still, she was comforted knowing he wasn't a big jock. Still, if he'd been on the team, perhaps he'd been friendly with Jett. Perhaps he knew exactly who she was and was just giving her a hard time, assuming she and Jett were still together or something. It was easier for the team to remember Eden then it was for her to remember them. For them all they had to remember had been her: Jett's girlfriend. For her, well learning all the names of all the guys on two football teams that had combined? That had been a little more tricky, and she was positive she'd forgotten most of them. Although they had gotten together after football season had ended so there was probably a whole slew of football guys that Eden was unaware of. She'd never really been interested in sports, well, except for surfing.

"Do I look like a cheerleader?" she asked, giving him a look when he mentioned it, although quickly realizing that with her long blonde hair and short skirt that she probably could be mistaken for one, she quickly waved her hand in front of her as if to dismiss the idea, "Never mind, that was rhetorical," she said. "I'm not a cheerleader. I just figured no one would be here and I could get away with smoking."

But smoking made her hungry and her stomach growled as if on cue. "Besides smoking, I enjoy eating," she said lightly, and with a bit of a laugh. The high from the pot had put her in a better mood making it easier to forget the effed up relationship that still was haunting her when she was sober. "You enjoy eating?" she asked, pulling out her cell to check the time. Eden didn't wear a watch.

"We still have like 30 minutes to go eat off campus and make it back before class," she said, "you have a car? I didn't drive myself today and my brother might murder me if I drive his car all fucked up. You only had like one hit, you're good, right?" Eden was more talkative when she smoked, that's really why she had started doing it so much when she was younger. Well, Ben had tried it first and once Eden had she realized it had made her more outgoing which she had needed back then because she used to be so shy and awkward.

"Oh and I'm Eden so tell me your name so I don't have to worry that I'm about to be abducted by some creeper," she joked, as she started to walk down the bleachers. Truth be told, he went to her high school so she wasn't really worried. Had he been some random stranger she'd be more careful, or at least she liked to tell herself that. She took one more hit before putting out the joint, it was mostly done anyway so she tossed it in a trashcan figuring there was no need to save it for later. Later she'd pack up her bong which gave her a better high anyway.

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