It's Clobbering Time - Evan tag Patch

[Evan Hughes]

As the afternoon went on, and Evan slipped into his usual habit of ignoring the boring stuff his teachers spoke about (it wasn’t his fault if nearly everything they said was boring), he found his thoughts drifting to Aly and Jasper. Considering his class daydreams were usually focused on Brit, or getting up to something stupid with Patch, these thoughts weren’t a welcome change. He wasn’t all that great at a lot of things, but pranking was his and Patch’s domain. And no one was going to one-up them and get away with it, especially when it was crazy step-sister and boring rich dude. Even though everyone thought that Evan and his friends had done it (he’d even been congratulated a few times), so there was no harm done to his ‘reputation’, he knew differently and it irked him. He didn’t like the thought of Aly winning.

Especially with the punishments unfairly dished out to them. He really didn’t want to clean out the locker room, it would be boring, and smelly, and there was much better ways of spending his time. Plus he wasn’t looking forward to the look on his mum’s face when he got home. He just knew she would have been called, and she probably spent all afternoon thinking of other punishments too.

But, worse of all was Patch being benched for the rest of the season. That was his best friend after all, and Evan felt almost as annoyed as he did by it. They couldn’t let them get away with this! Patch had to play. As keen as he was on the ideas that they all came up with at lunch, he felt that they needed even more too. After all, those ideas were going to be fun, but they wouldn’t get Patch back playing again.

He felt that they needed another approach, a more personal attack by him and Patch. And seeing how they hadn’t paired up, just the two of them, in anything really good (or bad) since the ACCIDENTAL fire at Jessica’s face, it was going to be interesting. “Patch! Patch!” he cried out seeing his friend leave the school front doors, running up to catch him. “We’ve gotta get you playing again.”

[Patch Kimball (aka DJ Fluff)]

Patch trudged down the hall, scuffing his sneakers against the floor, caught up in his own misery. He had tried to drown out his disappointment with loud music, but even Apples In Stereo couldn't pull him out of his funk. This had to be the worst timing in the history of undeserved punishments: Tomorrow was the Exhibition soccer match, the girls against the boys. He'd been looking forward to that (although winning it wouldn't be quite as satisfying as winning a normal match. What glory was there in beating a bunch of girls?) and now he couldn't play! And his plans for college, ruined because of one stupid (clever) prank he hadn't even participated in. The injustice stung.

He heaved a sigh as he pushed through the crowds, out the double doors and onto the quad. He was reluctant to go home, where his parents would undoubtedly be waiting to ground him. Again. Or perhaps they'd concocted some other, worse punishment. He wanted to put off the inevitable as long as possible, which meant walking as though his shoes had weights in them, hoping that perhaps if he took long enough reality would change such that he wouldn't be in trouble. Or maybe he'd wake up and discover that this was all a horrible dream. It didn't seem that very many dreams had such realistic depictions of classwork, though.

He gave a start when he realized that someone was calling his name. "Evan!" He turned his music off and scooted to one side, away from the departing crowds. "Hey! Yeah, I wish." He shook his head despondently, "They had to pull this the day before the Exhibition match, didn't they?" He complained. Was there any hope they'd be able to clear their names in time for the game tomorrow? It seemed unlikely. To make matters worse, clearing his name would ruin their reputation as the school's top pranksters. He wasn't thrilled with either option, but in truth he'd rather be allowed to play again than keep his reputation for pranks. After all, he wanted to play soccer for a living, and getting benched his last semester of high school really wasn't conducive to that goal.

"If you have any ideas for proving to the principal it wasn't us then share them, cause I sure can't think of anything. There's no way we'll get Aly and that Hastings guy to fess up."

[Evan Hughes]

Patch’s despair immediately affected Evan, they were best friends after all, so what bummed Patch out also bummed Evan out. And he hated to bummed out. “Well, you know them, they’re evil. I didn’t realise this evil though. We have to make them suffer. I mean, not in like, an actual suffering way, but you know.” It was good, he didn’t have to explain his sometimes confusing words to his friend.

“Um, maybe we could try to appeal to Aly’s good side. I mean, at least part of her’s gotta be human, right? Yeah, thought so.” Evan sighed, scratching at his chin. He didn’t bother starting walking again, he wasn’t too keen on getting to his car, and then home, and he was sure Patch wasn’t eager to get home either. Not with that both had waiting for them.

He couldn’t think of anything that would get Aly and Jasper back, make them confess to the principal, and get Patch back playing before the game tomorrow. So maybe they had to find another way of looking at the situation. “Well, maybe we don’t have to get Aly to admit that she did it. Cause you’re right, I don’t think she will.” Evan agreed. “Maybe we could just get her to speak to your coach, or the principal, or whoever to get you back into the game tomorrow. I know it’s a long shot, but, I can’t think of anything else. Nothing that would work in time for tomorrow.” he shrugged. “We could see her tonight. Or I just could, if you think just the one of us has a better shot, and ask her. I’ll keep bugging her until she gives in. She’s a cheerleader, and they think she’s good, they don’t realise that she’s really just evil, so maybe they will listen to her.”

It did make Evan just a little nervous, talking to Aly, getting her help (even if it was her fault that they were in this situation to begin with, which was just plain annoying). Because if he somehow managed to get her to agree to help Patch out, which didn’t seem likely, and she somehow managed to talk the ‘authorities’ into allowing Patch to play, something which seemed only a little more likely to happen than getting Aly to agree in the first place, he knew how his girlfriend’s step-sister would take this. He would owe her one. And out of all the people he would be happy to owe favours to, she wasn’t even close to getting on that list. But Patch was his best friend, and he would do anything for his best friend. Including making deals with the devil.

“Apart from that, I’ve got nothing. This is really, really annoying.” he complained. “I can’t believe they beat us like this!”

[Patch Kimball (aka DJ Fluff)]

Patch was touched that Evan was offering to talk to Aly for him. When it came down to it, it would make more sense for Evan to talk to her, because he was dating her step-sister, but it wouldn't be fair to make his friend talk to someone like Ms. Prissy Plastic. "Ha. Thanks." He flashed a smile that quickly faded. "But you don't have to do that. She might...I don't know....eat you or something, and then I'll never see you again. That would suck." That would almost be worse than not playing soccer again. No! Not almost, it would definitely be worse. At least if he had to, he could follow in his fathers footsteps and coach a local rec team, but if something happened to Evan there was no way to resurrect him. "And she probably would be happy that I can't play. Evil, remember?"

He wished that pleading with Aly would succeed, because he would have seriously considered abandoning dignity if that had been a guaranteed method of resuming playing. Only, it wasn't. They could both debase themselves before a snotty cheerleader for absolutely no gain. And then what? She would have power over them -- or more power than she already had. How, how had she and pretty boy Jasper managed to pull this off? "I mean, yeah, we do need to make sure they realize this isn't the end. We're still more boss than them." He and Evan (and Mal and Brit and their friends) wouldn't be outdone! Oh, no, they would find some way to get even. He just wished they could do that and have their punishments revoked at the same time.

"I guess I'll survive not playing tomorrow..." He sighed, sounding unconvinced. "So we'll just focus on revenge and I'll try and talk to coach Johnson, maybe he'll work out something." He grimaced. More locker room cleanup? Well, he could handle that. He could...would....handle most anything if only he could play again. He knew his reputation for mischief would work against him, but his coach was less scary to talk to than Aly. Sure, Coach Johnson could get pretty intense, and practices were one place that Patch was definitely not keen on acting up at, but he cared about his players. And, more importantly, he cared about winning. Patch knew he was a good player, he wouldn't have gotten permission to try out for Silver's team otherwise. So he just had to hope that Coach Johnson considered him more than good. Indispensable sounded nice. Could he sway his coach to that line of thinking? He would have to try!

[Evan Hughes]

Evan would have happily, well, maybe not happily, but he would have tried talking to Aly if Patch had wanted him to. He would do everything for his bestest of best friends, well not everything, he wouldn’t do Patch’s homework for him, but that was mainly because he so often didn’t do his own. Apart from that, pretty much nothing else was off limits. Something about burning down a house and being in a fight together really helped cement a friendship. It was probably a good thing it hadn’t occurred to him, because he would have even gone so far to suggest both of them get tattoos.

But even so, he was obviously relieved when Patch told him not to. He hadn’t even considered how Aly would react. That she might eat him. She probably wouldn’t, he told himself, but still, the girl was really unnerving. He didn’t understand how guys could want to...you know...do the dirty with her. Like Jasper and Tyler. Weren’t they worried she would bit their head off afterwards, like a praying mantis? It was nice to know that Patch didn’t want him eaten. He had never been eaten before, but he was fairly sure he wouldn’t like it.

“You’re right. She and Jasper are probably celebrating it now. She is evil.” he shuddered. “See! She’s so evil she even makes me shudder! I feel for Brit, having to actually live with her. And be semi-related. Cause she’s evil.” Evan reminded Patch, with another shudder.

“Totally more boss.” he quickly agreed, thinking that anyone who knew both him and Patch, and Aly and Jasper, would also have to agree. There was no way anyone could say differently. Sure, the evil pair might have been a little prettier than him and Patch, but that was it. In every other way, they were totally more awesome than the evil step-sister and rich dude. More fun, for starters.

“But I was really looking forward to you playing tomorrow!” Evan protested, disappointed, but he knew he wasn’t anywhere near as disappointed as Patch. “I was going to make you up a banner and cheer really loudly. Annoy everyone. You know, the usual. Maybe talk to the coach as soon as you can tomorrow, try to convince him that the team won’t win without you. Cause you know that’s true.” He may not know much about soccer, what he did know was what Patch had tried teaching him, but he felt he knew enough to be able to tell that his friend was easily the best player on the team. And he wasn’t being biased in the slightest.

They had to get all kinds of revenge on the pair though. It was only right. “Well, we’ll get them back. Brit, Mal and Zac’s help is gonna be mad, the five of us will be able to come up with some mad payback. And maybe just the two of us could come up with something.” Cause, let’s face it, Evan decided, whenever he and Patch teamed up to do something, it was always so cool.

“I was thinking, you wanna maybe do something on the weekend? Even if we don’t really do anything? I mean, hang out or something. It’s been a while since just the two of us hung out. I really feel like doing something stupid. Maybe I could jump off the roof of my house.” he suggested. “Or we could go to the arcade. Or maybe go to the movies and pick on any guy being dragged to a girly movie. That’s if we’re not grounded.”

[Patch Kimball (aka DJ Fluff)]

Patch was fairly certain that the team could (and would) win this match even without him. After all, it was only Silver's boys against Silver's girls. It wasn't like they were playing a team of comparable skills. That didn't mean he wanted to miss out, though. The competition was only part of the fun; running and kicking at things and sweating were the other, arguably more important part. After all, if he just wanted competition he could join the chess club or debate team. But neither of those offered the physical exertion and adrenaline rush of Soccer.

"Yeah, I'll try and talk to him. Maybe he'll relent..." He wasn't too hopeful, but if he didn't ask he'd never know. "You can still make a banner and cheer loudly." He pointed out. "I'll be there. Just not playing." Watching his teammates have fun while he sat around wasn't exactly his idea of fun, but he couldn't imagine his parents letting him skip out. When he'd gotten kicked in the eye in Elementary school and couldn't play, his father had still made him go to support the team. And he did like his teammates, he wanted them to do well. He just wanted to play with them!

"Yeah, of course!" With five of them dishing out vigilante justice there was no way Aly and Jasper would win the prank war. That didn't solve the problem of soccer, but making them suffer would make him feel just a little better. "What about Kian and Mike? We could rope them into helping." He suggested. Although both his childhood friends were so busy with boyfriends. This was the problem with dating, it meant his friends abandoned him the moment they found someone they fancied. Except for Evan, who must be the only person in the entire history of the world who could balance dating and friends. That only made Evan that much more amazing. "Course we'll do something just the two of us. We'll get them good." He agreed. He just wished he could think of something right now, but his thoughts were too focused on soccer.

"Do I want to do something? Hell, yeah!" He agreed, cheered by the though of spending the weekend with his friend. Maybe they could come up with a brilliant plan then, in between hanging around doing nothing. Or something stupid, whichever they felt like at the moment. "Don't mention grounding!" He winced, memory of the last time his parents had been called by the school. "More like my parents're gonna murder me. For something I didn't even do. I'd almost rather face psycho chick, at least she's mad at me for something I did. Even if it wasn't on purpose and we apologized." He still didn't get why she hadn't accepted the apology, they'd been entirely sincere, what else did she expect out of them?

"Although she might get that Felipe guy to help her, and we didn't do anything to him..." He mused. That was really such a shame the guy had to side with psycho chick. He'd seemed like such a cool dude, someone who had known all about the sport Patch loved, and then he had to go and get ensnared by Jessica. That was going to be so awkward if he did end up joining the team..."Oh, shit." Brown eyes went wide as a new possibility dawned on him. "He wanted to join the soccer team. What if they replace me with him?" Great, just great, he was going to be replaced by someone who hated him, someone who would make sure the remainder of the semester was miserable. "Shit. Shit, shit, shit. Is there any possible way to make the rest of the semester not suck?"

[Evan Hughes]

“Yeah, but that’s no fun for me.” Evan admitted with a grin. “It’s more fun for me cheering you on, and having a go at everyone you’re playing against, than like, cheering on your team in general. And I was going to go with a pirate themed banner too for tomorrow!” Aly and Jasper really had to go and wreck all their fun. They had to get them back, so, so bad. And then Evan and Patch would laugh, and laugh, and laugh. He had been really happy with his pirate themed idea too! There was going to be the banner, and he was going to yell pirate themed things from the sidelines. They just wrecked it all for him. Oh, it was also an awesome bummer that Patch wouldn’t be playing. He figured it’ll be boring to watch the game if his friend wasn’t in it.

“Course Coach will relent!” Evan insisted, trying to make up for Patch’s (understandable) pessimism with his own, sometimes over the top, enthusiasm. “I mean, he did you let on the Silver team, even though you’re not from Silver,” just in case his friend momentarily forgot what school he went to, “So that must mean he can also tell that you’re a mad player. So if that’s true, and I know it is, it’s not like I’m ever wrong, it’ll mean that of course he will want you to keep playing. And if he doesn’t give in straight away, let me know, and I can keep bugging him until he does. I’m really persistent that way.” Few people could continue saying no after days of being followed around by a grinning Evan, saying nothing but “Please!”

He didn’t think Patch would say no to the offer of just the two of them hanging out on the weekend, a bit of bromance so to speak, but it still made him glad that his friend was just as excited as he was at the prospect. Hanging out with Brit was awesome, she was easily the coolest chick ever, and funny, and hot, and mad fun to make out with. Hanging out with his big group of friends was also cool, he loved surrounding himself with people, he loved all the noise. But nothing quite matched the sheer awesomeness of just hanging out with your best bud. He and Patch did get up to some awesome fun together, things he couldn’t see anyone else finding appealing. Plus, Patch was just a cool dude.

“That’s really, really wrong.” Patch’s parents had to be mean, Evan thought, if they thought Patch really was one of those responsible. Come on, they weren’t stupid. Well, they weren’t that stupid. “I’m not sure I’d rather face her. She’s really scary. And she hits really, really hard. It’s embarrassing being beaten up by a girl. It’s not like you can hit back. And she’s strong. Doesn’t look it, but she is. I think I’d just rather avoid them all.”

From what Patch had told him, that Felipe guy seemed pretty cool, so it was bad that he was now siding with Jessica. Blinded by her feminine charms, Evan figured, though if Jessica did have those, she kept them well hidden, he thought. At least if he got into a fight with Felipe, he could hit him back. A good thing, given that he was sure that he could hit harder than Jessica.

“No, they wouldn’t replace you with him. Would they?” Evan joined in on the worry. Surely not, Patch rocked at soccer, they couldn’t replace him, it would be stupid to. “Nah, they won’t, don’t worry.” he told him confidently, even squeezing his shoulder gently, trying to comfort him or something.

“Well, don’t worry, we’ll come up with something. It’s us after all, we’re awesome! We’ll get you playing again, we’ll get Aly and Jasper back, and we’ll do some mad pranks! It’s all good.” He hoped that would be the case, but surely it had to be. No one could outdo the two of them. They were like awesome to the power of squared. “Well, wanna come back to my house now then? Give you a bit more of a break before you have to go home. If my mum’s there, we can just say you’re over to do some homework or something. Then we can go up to my room, maybe play with the snakes, or watch a movie. You can even play around on my drums if you want.” And because his friend was in dire need of cheering up, Evan even sweetened the deal. “You can raid my secret candy stash.”